Answer 12 questions about your daily routine to find out which famous artist you were in a past life!
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The lives of artists are often mythical in nature, completely obscure, and at times totally messy. With the help of some tenacious biographers, we now have better insight into the fuel that fired some of the world’s greatest geniuses. Did you know that Beethoven was very unpopular with his landlorShow More
The lives of artists are often mythical in nature, completely obscure, and at times totally messy. With the help of some tenacious biographers, we now have better insight into the fuel that fired some of the world’s greatest geniuses. Did you know that Beethoven was very unpopular with his landlords due to the constant flooding of his apartment? Or that for years David Lynch would head to Bob’s Big Boy for lunch, consuming a massive chocolate shake and seven cups of sugar-drenched coffee? The rush would throw him into a frenzy where he would scribble all of his thoughts down on the napkins scattered across this table.
How about the time when Mark Twain could only fall asleep if he was lying on his bathroom floor? Better question: Does that sound like something you might do? If you’re curious to see which artist is your spirit animal, you should totally take our quiz!
What’s the first thing you think about in the morning?
- Ugh, not again. Can’t I just stay in bed all day?
- How anxious I am.
- Wow, I’m really hungover. And late for work.
- How cold it is. Nomadic-style living in a yurt was a bad idea.
- How tired I am.
- Morning? I don’t wake up until late afternoon.
Favorite breakfast?
- A five-course meal with fresh ingredients from the local farmers market.
- Breakfast is for losers, unless, you’re already awake watching the sunrise. Then, breakfast is for winners. And poets.
- Begrudgingly, coffee.
- The same thing every day. What can I say? I love routine!
- Anything except for egg yolks and coffee.
- Adderall.
On your visit to the newsstand, what reading material do you gravitate towards?
- I only read Breitbart News on my Google Pixel.
- I’d prefer to read a manuscript from a struggling artist.
- Psychology Today. Great publication.
- A new notebook for my sketches.
- Creepy comic books and medical journals.
- A copy of Bitch, Bust and Ms. Magazine.
How do you relax?
- Manual labor. It really clears the mind for more cerebral tasks.
- By responding to emails and taking naps.
- I drive around in my car, looking for anything that inspires me.
- I invite a friend over around noon to drink a bottle of wine before heading out for the night.
- Nibbling a bit of chocolate. I’ll have some lemonade too if I’m feeling wild.
- I take a 20-minute nap and then back to work.
Do you have a daily vice?
- Some light cross-dressing.
- Just a few uppers to keep me going. Maybe some Vicodin too.
- Spending way too much money on the latest hipster hotspots like Vespertine.
- Massive meals.
- Going to flea markets looking for vintage treasures, if you can call that a vice.
- Three cigarettes per day.
What inspires you?
- Witty banter and gossip.
- Going camping and watching the television show Dual Survival.
- Crossfit, bro.
- Disorder and chaos.
- Paul Ryan.
- To love and be loved.
It’s the end of the day. How do you let loose?
- Nothing completes me more than sitting in complete darkness.
- I have friends come by for lively discussions about art and literature.
- By reading and listening to music.
- We go for drinks at the pub, followed by dinner at a private club, then on to the nightclubs!
- By jumping into bed with my latest lover. Then, heading to the local cannabis dispensary.
- I play Fortnite or watch Fox News.
Who do you invite to dinner at your house?
- The cool kids that just joined my art collective.
- I would love to invite Dr. Phil over to discuss subconscious behavior.
- Only close friends. I hate social engagements! They get on my tits!
- I prefer to go out on the town with friends!
- The random I met at the bar last weekend.
- I don’t have time for dinner parties because I don’t like people.
Describe what’s on the menu at your dinner party?
- Bottles upon bottles of wine. Also heavy, rich food.
- Anything Whole-30 approved or paleo.
- Ramen. From a box.
- A recipe that I found in my Barefoot Contessa Cookbook.
- Who cares? Love will keep us alive.
- Whatever my husband cooks for me. We eat together while I read him my latest rantings.
What time do your guests disperse?
- Lights out by 10 p.m.!
- On the early side. I hate for social affairs to interrupt my schedule!
- Until conversation and gossip runs dry!
- I tend to force my fellow bar-mates to come home with me for one last drink.
- They usually spend the night.
- Whenever my uppers wear off.
All of your guests have left. What do you do now?
- Write twenty pages of my manuscript.
- Sleep like a baby.
- Have a nightcap with myself, while I watch the Home Shopping Network to fall asleep.
- I don’t have guests over because I don’t have electricity.
- Chain smoke and stare moodily out the window.
- Wake up my lover to discuss the entire day as we fall asleep in each other’s arms.
What is your biggest struggle of the day?
- Remembering what I worked on.
- Keeping my demons at bay.
- Staying productive!
- Finding a drinking buddy who’ll go as hard as me.
- Completing all of my tasks before dusk.
- Trying not to alienate people with my unhinged behavior.
Last question - how would you rate this quiz?
- I loved it!
- It was pretty okay.
- Not great…
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